Suck a bag of dicks.
Your sole purpose in life is to make people hate you.
You’re supposed to be the shortest month, why do you NEVER FUCKING END?
Seriously, what are your redeeming qualities? Valentine’s Day? Shut up.
Statiscally, depression levels are at their highest when it’s your turn on the calendar. (Statistics reported by myself and two friends.)
Cold, wet, gray. Awesome. Real crowd pleaser.
Did I already tell you you to suck a bag of dicks? I’m telling you again, my hatred for you warrants it to be repeated.
Basically, I really despise you, February. March may be cold and wet as well, but at least March is never an asshole about it like you are. Get out of here and quit bringing everyone down.
*My Kindle kept autocorrecting ‘bag of dicks’ to ‘bag of ducks’. Haha.
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